7 - Self Analysis

I posted a blog about evaluating myself.
This entire site is really, just a blog. But I broke it down into sections for ease of access. If I were to visit my own site, I want to see some sort of organization, however minimal. I don’t have time to search for things. That’d turn me away really fast.

I’ve been thinking about changing the site design to something like a wiki. Improved readability.
Eventually, when I have like a hundred posts, that’ll fall into place.

Today is 18th February 2018.
Woke up, got ready, wasn’t really sure about going to the temple but I ended up doing it.
Harinama sankirtana, and back. Loaf of bread for sandwiches and milk.
Got some breakfast ready, gave someone an oil massage on the shoulder. Physiotherapy didn’t reduce the pain so now, gotta try something new.

Was out for most of the day yesterday. Visited a relative, a friend. With his beautiful wife and kid. Really cool folks.
And I was listening to his experience on various stuff. His education, marriage, work, friends, family problems etc.
It’s always interesting to hear a different perspective. Broadens your views on things.
I think I’m pretty open-minded about most things. There are some things I do differently but that’s my lifestyle. I’m happy with it and don’t wish to change them.
So he asked us to stay for lunch and when we sat, I had to let them know I didn’t eat onions and garlic. But I didn’t want to come out as prudish, y’know. That’s just my preference. It’s not a religious thing, although, it aligns with the religious principles.
And I don’t drink tea/coffee. And I don’t eat out.
These are just the basics of who I am.
So he told me not to be strictly religious and, you know, enjoy life; make friends, go out for a cup of coffee, meet new people and so on.

He’s not wrong.
I don’t want to defend my preferences or make excuses, but rather, view things with the facts on hand.
I like the logical approach. There’s a sound reasoning behind everything, rather than blind tastes and beliefs.

I don’t see myself as some religious personality.
I’m just a regular guy whose lifestyle happened to fit in with the religious standards.
Do I believe in the existence of God? Yes.
Do I believe in everything that’s prescribed and happens with religions? No. I don’t.
Coming from a Christian background, I placed my faith in God largely based on my personal thoughts and beliefs, rather than the logical facts.
I thought God existed because I wanted him to exist. I like the character of Yahweh and Jesus Christ. I liked what they stood for, what they represented. I liked their teachings. It felt right.
But I had no proof. There was no logic to it.
The Hare Krsnas changed that. I started going to the temple because I fit right in, without having to change much. There was no transition. I didn’t have to give up anything. I was already on the right track. I just merged in.
They had kirtanas, I liked music. They had lectures, I liked the stories of God. They had prasadam, I liked free food.
They have a lot more than that. But I stuck to what I liked.

Most people who meet me in real life now identify me with the Hare Krsnas.
That’s where they’re wrong.
If I stood outside a Church on Sunday, watched people come out after mass, and identified each one as a Christian, would I be right? Superficially, yes. Goes to church, Christian.
But realistically, No.
I’ve been studying the Bible since childhood. And there are so many teachings from the Bible that these “Christians” don’t follow. Or don’t want to follow. Either way, in my book, that automatically disqualifies them from being Christians.

Similarly, there are many things with the Hare Krsnas that I don’t like, agree with, or follow. <br A non-religious person will read this post and say “Okay! I see where you’re coming from” while a religious person, both Christians and Hare Krsnas will internally scream “Oh my God! Demon! He’s a demon in disguise!”
You can think what you want. I don’t care.

I have, therefore, refused to preach to anyone. Or impart any philosophical teachings to people in real life. They have mistaken my identity. I wouldn’t want to create a false impression by representing an entire religion.
I don’t represent Christianity. Nor the Hare Krsnas.
I am me. One dude. One single guy, with an independent mind and viewpoint. I’m subject to change if I see the need. I’m willing to improve if it’s beneficial to me.

I’ll mention some of the things I don’t agree with off the top of my head. I’ve discussed a few in the past.
Why is the top guy of the Church, the Pope, a man? Why isn’t it a woman?
Equal opportunity. I want to see men and women exist in the same field.
I see both men and women cooking in the same kitchen in a Hare Krsna temple. But a lot of temples, including the one I visit, forbid women from certain tasks. Women can’t do the deity dressings, aarti, lead kirtanas or play instruments.

The Bible states that woman was created from a man’s rib. Her duty is to serve and assist him. Fair enough. The Vedas have a similar viewpoint.
I see that men are enabled to do tasks typically meant for women. But women can’t do the same. That’s unfair.

Gay relationships. It’s forbidden in the old testament. Why are the churches accepting gay weddings?
I know I sound like a total douche to some people right now. But it is what it is. It’s forbidden in the Bible. Yet the church feels it should be allowed so a large number of people aren’t angry.

Child marriages in the Vedas. I’ve read about it. That tradition doesn’t exist within the Hare Krsnas, but is still followed in some remote parts in India.
I don’t find it acceptable. I don’t agree with it.
It may have worked in the previous yugas, but this is Kali Yuga. That sort of tradition is now extinct. Won’t work.
Even if the parents arranged a child’s engagement, when they grow up, they definitely won’t want to marry that person.

Arranged marriages. I’m not sure about this. In the scriptures, for the Ksatriyas, the bride used to hold a svayamvara ceremony. A bunch of men would stand in a line and she would inspect them and give the garland to the man she desired.
That was a choice. But only for the lucky few who happened to hold one.
Otherwise, the rest of the women had to go the arranged way.

The caste system.
In the Satya yuga, there was only one caste of men. They were called the Hamsas, if I remember correctly.
By the time Dwapara Yuga arrived, there were four classes of men.
In the Kali Yuga, Srimad Bhagavatam states that everyone is born a Sudra - 4th class.
So to advance to a higher class, e.g. Brahmana/Ksatriya, you must have the qualifications for that. You must have the personality and engage in activities that define a Brahmana/Ksatriya.
If everyone is a Sudra, why do a large population in India still practise segregation? What makes these people think they’re any better than others?

Again, marriages in India still happen between people of the same caste. If you’re born in a “Brahmana” family, you get married to someone from a “Brahmana” family. If you’re born in a “Ksatriya” family, you’ll find your partner from a similar one.
WHY? Why is this happening?
These “Brahmanas” have no brahminical qualities. They eat meat, drink liquor, open up businesses, lie, cheat, steal and do all sorts of nonsense while wearing a Brahmana thread.
And they have the audacity to tell others they’re brahmanas.
A brahmana is supposed to be sober, humble, accept grains in charity, donate the excess, keeping nothing for the next day; study the scriptures, impart scriptural knowledge to others, perform sacrifices (although sacrifices have been forbidden in Kali Yuga because no one is qualified to do them) etc.

Similarly, A Ksatriya is supposed to be firm, determined, strong, brave, protect the brahmanas and cows, defend his nation, govern, control and perform administration duties etc.
Basically, a Ksatriya would be a king or warrior. In the modern day, a Ksatriya would be tasked to perform somewhere in the government.
Where are these Ksatriyas today? They’re nowhere to be found within the government administration. All the governments in Kali Yuga are full of sudras and mlechhas. The lowest of the low. The 4th class of men. A bunch of corrupt greedy meat eaters and women plunderers. Instead of giving protection to the women, these asshole defile the women and children!

Opening business, trading, farming etc is the work of Vaisyas. The 3rd class of men.
What used to be a 3rd portion of men in the previous yugas is now the standard in Kali Yuga.

Engaging in manual labor and serving the upper castes is the duty of sudras.

So, the varnasrama system has been explained very well in the scriptures. But people are not following them. They have no knowledge about them.
Isn’t it amazing that the standards that were defined in the Vedas have now been misrepresented and misused to favor the top tier rich assholes and enslave the rest of the population in India?

Then again, I’m not surprised. If you’ve read my blog post on the Symptoms of Kali Yuga, I’ve quoted Srimad Bhagavatam on these issues.

I was talking about religious things I don’t agree with. That somehow turned into things Indian people do that I don’t agree with.

Meat eating. The Old Testament in the Bible prescribed the rituals that were to be followed by people who ate meat. I remember the teachings that the Lord gave to Moses to give to the Egyptians when he was guiding them across the red sea. In one of those chapters, the Lord describes the types of animals and birds that could be eaten, and those that could not be eaten and were unclean. He also describes the sacrificial process at the altar.
Modern Christians don’t offer any sacrifice to the Lord’s altar. They don’t pray for the animal. They don’t do anything close to what was originally described by the Lord to Moses.
Instead, slaughterhouses have been established worldwide. Everyone buys processed and packaged meat or fresh meat at the butcher’s.
You’re doing it wrong.

The world is headed to a deep and dark place.
The first things to get compromised are the religious institutions. Principles get slackened to gain wide acceptance. Rules are slackened. And pretty soon, there is no moral standard to follow. Everyone does as they please as long as others think it’s okay.

Being religious isn’t a job. It shouldn’t be the defining attribute when describing someone. It should already be there. So subtle that it’s by default.
Instead, we now live in a society where if you go to Church, you’re a Christian.
From the Vedas, everyone was religious in the previous yugas. That wasn’t even a consideration factor.

Back to me. I’m not a Hare Krsna. I’m me. I want to be defined and represented by my own individuality.

I live a balanced life. It’s always been that way. Read the bible, went to school, went out, had friends and all that stuff.
To think that some people think I have nothing else about me other than visiting the Hare Krsna temple and doing kirtanas is ridiculous.
I have other things going on. While it may not be so popular with others, it doesn’t make it any less real.

I read books, listen to music, go online, post on my social media, watch the news, read news articles, read tech articles, update myself with the latest tech trends, watch sports sometimes, go shopping and all that stuff.
What I don’t do is eat outside, go to the cinemas, have a bunch of friends and go on dates. I don’t do that.
So, generally speaking, I do things that involve being alone.
Yes. I’d like friends, but only if they’re as easy going and open minded as me.

Speaking of open minded, I think I’m a moderately open minded guy. Mainly because I still use my head when deciding what’s okay and what’s not.
A lot of people these days don’t think; they feel. They feel it’s okay as long as you’re not hurting anybody.
That’s okay.
I’m a freedom guy.
Maximum freedom. With common sense.
You have freedom to do and say as you please. But don’t be a retard. Set some lines and boundaries of what’s acceptable and what’s ridiculous.
I’ve done that.

I don’t drink, smoke or do drugs. If you do, eh, who doesn’t these days? But if you act like an idiot after that, I’m going to call you one. And I won’t allow myself to associate with your drunken ass.

I don’t go to bars, clubs or parties. If you do, eh… If you get drunk, high, throw money on strippers, or walk out with a different lady in your arms every night, I don’t see how your association is beneficial for me.

I don’t eat out. If you do, eh. I think a lot of these places aren’t really hygienic. Good luck with your typhoid/cholera.

I don’t believe in 73 genders, using the she pronoun for a man with a penis and the term non-binary. Call me close minded. I’ll ask you to refer to biology and basic science, assuming that you finished school.

I don’t promote watching porn. I think a lot of fetishes and fetish acceptance begins in some nutjob’s head and is legitimized by the porn industry. The more you get into it, the deeper the hole becomes. You get bored, try something new, get experimental, and pretty soon, cross all acceptable lines of morality and legality.
It fucks with your head.

Brainwashing can come from any source. Could be religion, could be your friends, could be your porn site. Try to remain independently open minded. Just because someone think it’s okay doesn’t mean you should think it’s okay.
I think I’ve pretty much remained independent for the most part.
Recently, I’ve been going to the temple every day of the week. And last week, when I sat down to do kirtanas after aarti, someone sneaked into the temple room, turned off the amplifier system and ran out.
So I continued without the mic but it amused me and slightly triggered me that someone, definitely one of the senior devotees, didn’t want me to do kirtanas but also didn’t have a pair to ask me to stop.
I call that mind-games.
There are multiple times when I was asked to do kirtanas that I turned down because the place was too far away. I’ll be damned if I have to sit in a car for 4 hours.
I was also asked to give lectures for beginners which I refused.
There have been other instances where they asked me to stay for service but I had to go do my own stuff.
I get where they’re coming from. They want me to get involved and do service, advance and get initiated.
I’m not ready for that. All I want for now is to go to the temple, attend aartis, sit for the kirtanas, and lectures, if any, and get out.
Prasadam isn’t that important to me right now because I have my own arrangements. But if I stayed to eat, maybe I’d be bound to listen to them?
I don’t know. Basically, I’m an independent. I’d prefer to keep it that way for now.
Like every other religious organization, I’ve witnessed some political play and I don’t want to be involved in that. Getting hands-on with some services means getting tied down with people above and below me. I’m not ready for that kind of stress. I go to the temple to get some peace of mind. Not get disturbed by unnecessary issues.

Speaking of politics, I’m an independent. I don’t have a political affiliation or fanboyism. If you keep up to date with the US political popcorn time sicne Trump got elected, you’ll understand why.

Okay. I’m tired.